Gabriel's Christmas 2011 Pictures

I can't believe how big he has gotten...and how fast it has flown by!

This is my favorite of them all!!


He looks thrilled haha

Cutie!

He posed himself in this one haha

My handsome man!!

I know...some of you don't care...

...but I'm not posting this for you. I am posting this because I am proud of myself for accomplishing this!





Now...well, once I actually finish getting it all typed up...onto the editing!

The hits keep comin'...

Well, this year so far has been an interesting one. Tyler has been overseas, except for when he came home to surprise me for my birthday, and that has actually been a lot easier than I thought it would be (so far). But now, while he is still overseas, my parents (where he lives when he is home) are being forced to move to a different part of the state.

Now, my family is very close, and that is why I thought this year would be ridiculously hard on all of us (and it has been, don't get me wrong), but now my parents are moving. We live about twenty minutes away from them and we go over to their house at least once a week if not twice a week or so and since they are going to be moving a few hours away, it will be moved down considerably. I am really not looking forward to it and I know they aren't either.

On a good note, Josh and I are doing a lot better than before...our marriage hasn't been the greatest so far...and it is definitely better now than it has ever been. We are even sitting down together and drawing out our dream home that we are going to build sometime in the future...(it could be twenty years from now before we can afford it, but I really hope it doesn't take that long.)...

I took some pictures of Gabriel this week and they turned out so great! I was going to make them Christmas pictures but they look more like Fall pictures so I am going to take some more Christmas pictures a little closer to December. I will post those pictures soon.

Well, that was a bit of a random post but I don't have a whole lot more to say at the moment...catch y'all later!

New Hair Color

So I got bored with going back to my natural hair color and I decided that I wanted something different. I really liked being a brunette but I thought it might be fun to try an auburn color. When Mom and I went to look for a color, I didn't see the one that I liked but I saw one that was pretty so we took it home to try...

I LOVE IT!!!!

What do you guys think??

Goodbye, Tyler...

Gabriel saying goodbye to Tyler at the airport...

Hey, guys!

Hey there, everyone. I just wanted to write a quick entry so that everyone knows I haven't dropped off the face of the earth haha. Tyler came in from overseas to surprise me for my birthday and I will try to post the video of it sometime for those of you who aren't on my facebook...but he leaves tomorrow to go back and he won't be coming back until at least May 2012...I am at my mom's right now where they have internet and I will be back here tomorrow or Sunday so I will try to write another entry...a longer entry...then. Hope everyone is well...

Grr

Once again, we don't have internet. We had to cancel it because we can't afford to pay for it right now. So, sadly, my next List of Five group of posts will have to be put on hold...you guys are really going to like this next group too and I am excited to share but they will have to wait. I am sitting in a Barnes & Noble right now because it has free wifi...so I won't be posting anything for a while until my parents get internet at their house (which I think is supposed to be soon) and then I can take my computer over there and use their internet. I will miss you all!!

You've just been overhauled!

I'm making sure I have the perfect five for my countdown before I start it again so it will be just a little bit longer before I do that again...




In the meantime, I have been giving my entire house an overhaul! It is ridiculous how much I have done in the past three days and how much still needs to be done...but we switched Gabriel's room to the third bedroom. It is a bigger room than the one he was in and it is painted a dark teal color from when it was Josh's old bedroom. He now has a full bed instead of a twin and it looks so much like a little boy's room instead of a baby room like his other one did.

If Josh and I ever have another little munchkin, the other room will be turned into a nursery, but for now it is going to be a library/home gym and I can't wait!! I have already moved my bookshelves in there from my bedroom and put a table in it for a television eventually, but what do you all think?

I have an Ab Circle machine and The Wave and they are both going in there. Tomorrow I am getting a Pilates Reformer and that is going in there and then it will be complete (once we get the tv obviously) and I'm so excited!!

Now, for the bad news from this week. Mom, Dad, Gabriel, and I were supposed to go up to Ft. Dix June 16-19th because Tyler had a pass and that way we could see him off because that is when he is leaving to go overseas. Well, he (and everyone else going) had to get a Smallpox vaccine yesterday and that means that there is a possibility he could give the disease to someone within the first 30 days of getting the vaccine. As much as I want to see Tyler off, there is no way I could take the chance of Gabriel getting anything. I cried for an hour...Mom and Dad are still going so he will still have someone there and I will see him when he gets back, but I was devastated.

I guess that's it for today. I will take more pictures tomorrow when I get my reformer and get it set up in my gym :) and then when I get everything in the house set up and cleaned. I can't wait until it is all done.

Again??...ABSOLUTELY!!

I'm going to do another list of hunks...and this time, they are almost all new! Gotta keep it updated and fresh! Bet you all can't wait!

Too Soon...

So Tyler leaves this Saturday for New Jersey. He doesn't leave for Afghanistan until the middle of June and Mom, Dad, Gabriel, and I are going up there to see him off, but he leaves here this Saturday.

We had his going away cookout yesterday and it was great. I don't have a lot to write but I wanted to share a picture with everyone because it is precious!!!





My little man with his Uncle Tyler...isn't it adorable?!?! This one is definitely getting printed out and hung up somewhere in the house...and soon!

Day 1 of 365

My newest tattoo (number seven) and my motivation. My mom and I have decided to take this year that Tyler will be overseas and turn it into something positive and work towards a common goal...we are going to use him as motivation to get in shape and, for me, basically better myself in every way. He doesn't leave until June, but I am starting now to get things rolling.

Have you all seen Monsters, Inc.?? Well, this is one of Gabriel's favorite movies and he watches it as often as I will let him. There is a part right near the beginning where Mike (the little green monster with one eye) wakes up Sully (the big blue monster with purple spots and horns) and he is like a personal trainer. He is yelling at him and motivating him and getting him to work out and do what needs to be done.

I wish I had a little green monster to help me get through my workouts. So I am going to channel my inner Mike. When I'm feeling a little unmotivated or I feel like giving in, I am going to picture Mike standing there yelling at me and keeping me motivated. "Less talk, more pain, marshmellow [girl]!" He says 'boy' right there because he is talking to Sully who is, obviously, a male monster...so I will have to switch it up a bit.

Haha man, you can tell I have a kid when I use an animated movie for motivation...along with my tattoo...But this gives me a year. I have a few goals along the way and I hope it doesn't take me all year to lose the weight I want but it does give me a little bit of room to have a bad day every once in a while and just pick it right back up and keep going.

He's three!

I can't believe how much he has grown over the years. He is tall enough now that everyone thinks he is a four year old. And it is insane how much he has grown just from last year. I can't believe my baby is three!!

I can't believe it...

My little man is turning 3 in three days!! On Thursday, I will be the mother of a 3 year old!! I can't believe how fast this time has gone. It seems like just yesterday he looked like this...

How can he be turning 3? He's not so little anymore!! This picture was taken in the hospital when he was just a day or two old. I can't believe how much he has changed and just how fast these three years have literally flown by.

On Thursday we are going to Natural Bridge to the Safari Park, the drive thru section and the walk thru section, because he loves animals and some of his favorites are there. He will be able to touch and feed a giraffe and I know he is going to love it!

Josh and my mom have off that day, dad took off, and my brother will be back tonight from training so we are all going and I can't wait!.

And then Gabriel's Spongebob birthday party is on Saturday...I will definitely post pictures!

Easter Pictures

I decided yesterday that I wanted to take some Easter pictures of Gabriel...here are some of my favorites. Let me know what you think.









Josh said that he had a cheesy grin in this picture but that is because when I say, "Smile!" Gabriel says, "Cheese!" haha










I love this one for some reason. He looks like he would rather be anywhere else than taking pictures but it is so cute! :)










Another 'cheese' picture but I love the way he is sitting. My handsome little man!










I LOVE this one. It is one of my favorites! I am going to get this one blown up so we can hang it on the wall somewhere...maybe in our bedroom. Ain't he a cutie!?!

And this one is my favorite of all the pictures I took...I think I took 17 or 18 pictures...I'm going to get this one blown up to hang too.

So what do you all think?

Stressful Weekend

The title tells it all. This weekend was so stressful that I am so glad it is over and that is definitely new for me. The biggest thing is that our fridge broke...and we didn't find out it was broken until we got home from buying $200 in groceries.

So instead of spending the whole day cleaning and organizing the house like we had planned, we had to go out and buy a brand new fridge. We have an emergency fund and we had enough money to spend on a new fridge (and a nice one at that) but I hate spending a lot of money like that when Josh doesn't make enough to put it back in any time soon...

And we still haven't fixed his car...it is still in the shop and we don't know how much it is going to be to fix it...and that was coming out of our emergency fund too. I'm really stressed about money anyway, and this didn't help.

And not only did we have to deal with that but Josh's stupid dog Roxy (that we have had so many problems with ever since we have gotten together) is driving me crazy. We have to keep her seperate from Toby (my boxer) because Roxy attacks her and literally tries to kill her. When we leave the house we leave Roxy inside and Toby and Apollo outside.

When we got home, Gabriel went to play in his room and he comes running out saying there was dog poop in his room. Roxy had gone into his room and pooped (twice in one day) after I had let her outside to go before we left...ugh! I was so mad. She is house trained, and I usually trust her in the house alone more than I trust the others, but not anymore. I could have killed her with my bare hands.

I am so over her attitude! She is the moodiest, most spoiled rotten dog on the face of the planet! I want to get a kennel, put it in the back yard, and stick her in there 24/7. Feed her in there, make sure she has water and a little bit of a shelter for when it rains, but keep her there forever!!! That would make me so happy but Josh won't let me do that. But, I swear, if she keeps up with this acting out, I am either going to put her up somewhere or we are going to get rid of her...and Josh will just have to deal with it...

I'm tired of coming up with titles...

So it turns out that my allergies haven't kicked in yet...I was just sick. Josh was sick (he gets sick a lot more now that he works at the hospital but he usually doesn't pass it to us) and then he gave it to Gabriel (but when Gabriel is sick all that happens is he gets a temperature and then he is fine), and then apparently it moved on to me...because now my mom is sick and I'm not anymore. This is good and bad at the same time. Good because I'm not dealing with being sick anymore but bad because that means my allergies are just laying in wait to make their big entrance.

My mom went today and bought one of those books that you record your voice reading it...you have all seen those right? Well, she got it for Tyler to record himself reading it so Gabriel can hear his voice while he is in Afghanistan for the next year. I think it is an amazing idea but I'm not going to be able to listen to it without breaking down...and we aren't even sure if Tyler is going to be able to make it through recording it without breaking down himself.

When Tyler gets back from overseas, we are going to get a tattoo together. We are going to get the tattoos of Aequitas and Veritas like the brothers from Boondock Saints have...we aren't going to get them on our hands, obviously, but that is the plan...I just have to figure out where to get mine and if I am getting one and he is getting the other or if we are both getting both of them. I wanted to get the tattoos before he went but he couldn't because he already had all of his bloodwork done and he wasn't allowed to get another tattoo until he gets back.

So...as the wedding this past weekend, the bridal party all got Batman shaped silly bands and I grabbed another one for Tyler because Batman is his favorite superhero...I asked if he would wear it while he was overseas and I would wear mine and whenever he looked down at it he could think of me/us and everytime I look down at mine I would think of him...even though I won't need a bracelet to be thinking of him the whole time he is gone...

Random post, I know...which is why I hate coming up with titles for entries that are all over the place and don't have a set theme haha

All or Nothing...

I realize now that I haven't been giving 100% to anything. I have only been doing things half way and that isn't getting me anywhere...so here goes!

No more half. No more almost. No more!

From now on it is All or Nothing...and I chose All! I'm not doing this anymore. I'm so tired of not getting any results and giving up. It is my fault I'm not gettting any results in the first place because I'm not giving it everything.

I don't want to stay like this forever and I can't keep putting it off. There is no time like the present!!

You're Lucky

I had written a long entry feeling sorry for myself and I almost posted it...but I decided to delete it and write a less depressing one.

I am still feeling sorry for myself and feeling down in the dumps but I am pretty sure it is because I am sick and it is Hell Week and I'm exhausted...but as soon as these things (or at least 2 out of 3) are remedied, I will be fine! And since it is supposed to be nice tomorrow and I have the car, I believe I might go to Booker T. Washington and hike the trail! I haven't been exercising like I need to be, but I am trying not to let it get me down. I just haven't felt like exercising because I feel like crap...

And it is too stinkin' hot in this house! You know how you feel miserable when you are hot and there is no escape?? Yeah, that's another thing bringing me down! I tripped up a little this weekend with my eating, but I am back on the ball with that too...

So.....this is definitely less depressing than I had written down, but it was still a bit depressing. Hopefully when I start feeling better I can write a more upbeat post.

Drowning...

I literally feel like I am drowing...these last few days have been interesting to say the least. The wedding was great but the whole day was a little overwhelming. My allergies kicked in and I was miserable the whole day. Everything that could go wrong did and I was completely and totally exhausted by the end of the day. I told Leslie (the bride) that I didn't have that many problems on my own wedding day.

Sunday was good other than my allergies because we spent the whole day with my brother and we had a great time. Today hasn't been as good...I have been miserable all day with my allergies and Hell Week and over all just feeling like crap.

We met Tyler for lunch and had a nice time and then I had to watch him walk away from us to be gone for another three weeks. As I watched him disappear around the corner, I broke down. I don't know what I am going to do the last time I see him before he leaves to be gone overseas for a year...

I think the biggest reason as to why I broke down (other than the fact that I am sad to watch him leave) is because I am overwhelmed and I feel like crap. That always puts me in a mood and never a good one. I'm stressed beyond belief, things just keep piling on, and I am literally drowning in a sea of desperation...

Ugh!

Weddings

So, one of my besties is getting married on Saturday and I am a bridesmaid. My dress is gorgeous and I can't wait to wear it! The rehersal is Friday night and that afternoon I have an appointment for a manicure and a pedicure and I am so excited!

Not only is this weekened going to be great because of Leslie's wedding, but my big brother will be in this weekend. Leslie is his friend too so he is coming to the wedding too. He will only be in from Friday until Tuesday and then he leaves to be gone for another three weeks of training somewhere else. I will post pictures if I remember to charge my camera and can get someone to take some pictures. I know there will be some from the professional photographer, but I am going to take some of my own too. This is a short little post but I am still trying to figure out how the heck to get my spaces back and what I did to mess it up...

Cute

I absolutely adore this picture of my dad and my little man...it is so cute!! :)

Ugh!

So I did my workout this morning but my heart just wasn't in it...so instead of being lazy and feeling sorry for myself, I got up and did another workout...this one was only 10 minutes instead of the 40ish minutes of all the rest of the videos and it is called 10 Minute Booty Blaster and let me tell you what...WHEW! That is one heck of a workout. I was sweating more in the ten minutes than I have with any of the other videos. I have decided that I am going to do the 10 Minute Booty Blaster every morning after every workout...I want results and I want them now and I am excited. Tomorrow is the only workout video that I haven't done yet and it is Hip Hop & Abs...it looks pretty intense but I'm looking forward to it. And I have also been doing really well today with my eating and I am going to keep it up because I am determined and I am excited. The website that I bought all of this from is called BeachBody.com and their motto is Decide. Commit. Succeed. and that is what I'm doing. I have decided to lose weight and get the body I want, I'm commited to exercising every day and eating right, and I will succeed! p.s.-->does anyone know what is up with the spacing and why I makes it all into a huge paragraph now instead of having spaces between them like I write it??

Random :)

I can't wait until my hubby gets home because he went and bought Tangled for me and he is bringing it home and we get to watch it! YAY!!!! I'm excited to see him too...haha...but I have been waiting to have this movie in my hands since I saw it in theaters by myself so long ago. This is seriously one of my favorite movies now and not just compared to other animated movies...I'm talking about all movies. That gives me an idea...maybe I should do a Top 5 or Top 10 favorite movies...hmmm food for thought! haha But, I also wanted to share this adorable picture of my and my almost 3 year old son...(I can't believe he turns 3 in a little over a month!!) I just love this picture!! What do you guys think?? I know I am a little biased, but my little man is going to be a heartbreaker! Yes, I know this post is extremely random, but it is always good to have a little randomness in your life haha :)

Still partying!

So I started Saturday with my 7 Day Swimsuit Slimdown and I have already lost weight! I'm not going to say how much I have lost on here until after I finish the 7 days to get a grand total, but I can't believe it and I am so thrilled! Saturday and Sunday I got up when Josh left for work at 6 a.m. and I worked out and then ate a healthy breakfast and continued to eat as healthy as I could for the rest of the day. I am so happy and encouraged and it is amazing! I can't wait to exercise every day and eating healthy is making me feel better and I have so much energy. It's amazing!! For someone that wants to lose weight and have fun doing it, I HIGHLY recommend Yoga Booty Ballet. You're sweating and pushing yourself but you are laughing and smiling and having a good time. It isn't like working out at all. I LOVE IT!!! And my will power is getting stronger everyday. I love Little Ceasar's pizza! It is my favorite. Well, we were at my parents' house yesterday and they decided to go get pizza. I didn't even think about giving in. I told dad that I couldn't have pizza and I asked if he would go to McDonalds right next to it and get me a fruit and walnut salad and a smoothie. Not completely healthy, but definitely healthier than pizza. I got up and got pizza for Josh and then I sat down and ate my healthy apples, yogurt, and walnuts. I was so proud of myself. And when I got on the scale this morning, I smiled because I knew it had been worth it! I can't wait to reach my goal, and if I keep going like this I will reach it in no time!!!! :) YAY!

Let's get this party started!!!

YAY! I am so PUMPED! I got up this morning and (since my hubby had off today and he took the munchkin with him to do some errands) I had the house to myself...and I wasn't about to let that go without a party!

What did I do first?? One of my Yoga Booty Ballet videos, of course! And it was amazing! I didn't break a sweat, because it was the Light & Easy video, but you don't stop moving the entire 40 minutes. And let me tell you what, I am feeling it now!

After my workout, I cleaned the house. I was so pumped from my exercise that in no time I was finished doing everything that I wanted to do today. So I sat down with my YBB stuff and figured out a plan and some groceries that I needed and I went to the grocery store.

With my YBB package came a 7 Day Swimsuit Slimdown to get a jumpstart for your Ab & Booty Makeover (yes, I am a little embarrassed to have gotten that particular package but those are the main areas I want to tone and slim...so I have gotten over it).

I am going to start Monday with the 7 Days but until then, I am just doing my own little thing. I am going to do whichever workout I feel like doing and eating healthy and sticking with the plan as much as possible. I am so excited. I am also going to continue to take Gabriel outside so he can run around and burn off some energy and so I can run around too. The more moving I do, the quicker I am going to see results.

Following the plan, I have a set video to do every day and I have to drink at least 8 glasses of water and eat healthy. They give you some recipies that I am going to follow too. I can't wait to do the videos. They are so upbeat and energetic and fun. These are the videos for each day:

Day One - Cardio Cabaret: Burlesque Style

Day Two - Go-Go

Day Three - Latin Flavor

Day Four - Light & Easy

Day Five - Body Sculpting: Bollywood Style

Day Six - Hip Hop & Abs and 10-Minute Booty Blaster

Day Seven - Cardio Cabaret: Burlesque Style

I have all of my measurements for my before and I do them again after seven days to see how much I have changed and how much weight I have lost. And I also have a bigger measurement tracker for my overall goal. I have to take before and after pictures too but that might be a bit more challenging since I'm not going to let anyone else take pictures of me and I can't get every angle by myself haha.

Now that I am really thinking about it...I might start tomorrow for the 7 Day Swimsuit Slimdown instead of Monday. I might as well start now. If I had really thought about it I would have started today, but that's all right. I am so excited!

And when I reach my ultimate weightloss goal, I know exactly what I want as a reward...

MY WINGS!!!

I already have small wings on my shoulder blades, but I am going to get them about this size. They are going to look a little different from this but this is the size they are going to be...obviously they have to be closer together at the top to cover my existing wings and they are going to have maroon and light blue in them instead of just black and grey...but this is going to be what I get when I have reached my goal!

I am SSSOOOOOOOOOO PUMPED!!!!!!!! Yay! Go me!

...

I always wanted to be a model...

...and my natural crappy hair actually looks awesome for once.

Will Power

All right, so after feeling sorry for myself all day I have come to one conclusion...If I want this, and I mean really want this, I am going to have to lose weight on pure will power. When I go to the fridge to get a Diet Mt Dew I grab a bottle of water instead. When I want to sit down and do nothing all day, I get up an exercise instead. When I want to stay inside in the nice cold AC, I go outside and chase my son around the yard instead. When I want to pig out on foods that are only keeping me fat, I am going to limit myself instead.

Josh took Gabriel tonight when he got home from work to play with one of his friends up the street so I could have some time. I haven't been feeling well and Gabriel was a terror today...I had every intention of sitting around the entire time and feeling sorry for myself while they were gone, but instead, I got up and exercised and now I am drinking a bottle of water. I basically wasted this entire day, but I am getting on the right track.

I am not going to let tomorrow be like today. I am going to take Gabriel outside and let him run around and I am going to run around too and I am going to exercise at some time tomorrow. And I have to help my dad lose weight too...I get my laziness from him...so this is a struggle for both of us.

But I am going to do this, and I am going to do it my own way! No Weight Watchers or counting calories...by shear Will Power I am going to lose weight and get in shape!

YBB

So I think I am just Weight Watcher-ed out. I'm not sure what I am going to do when it comes to eating because I can't seem to stick with anything...but I just ordered Yoga Booty Ballet and it is supposed to get here on Friday. It is the Ab and Booty Makeover...I am so excited. I have been watching the videos on youtube and I can't wait to start them.

It is definitely going to be a workout, they start moving and they don't stop until the end of the video (and they are all 40 minute videos) so I know I am going to be sweating about two seconds in, but it looks like so much fun. It's a mix of dance, ballet, and yoga!

If you haven't heard of this, go youtube some of the workouts. The instructors are a bit weird but fun at the same time. Has anyone ever tried YBB? I would like to hear some feedback...

The package that I bought comes with a nutrition guide, so I might follow that...I just don't know what I am going to do. But I know I have to do something because if I keep eating the way I have been eating, then it is going to completely cancel out the exercise I will be doing.

Any suggestions??

Lots to Update

First off, I would like to announce that I have lost seven pounds so far and I am still going strong. My first goal was to lose ten pounds before April 9th because I am in a wedding and I would like to shed a few pounds before then...so I have three more pounds to lose and plenty of time to do it. I have been doing yoga and being really strict with my Weight Watchers and my will power is through the roof! I'm very excited and I can't wait to reach all of my goals and then my ultimate goal!

Secondly, I haven't been to see a movie in theaters in a long time and just in the past few days I have seen four movies in theaters. I went first with my friend Leslie (whose wedding I am in on April 9th) to see Red Riding Hood. Has anyone seen that yet? What did you think of it? I LOVED it!! And then I went with my cousin Megan and my youth pastor's wife Jenn on Saturday to see Gnomeo and Juliet in 3D and that was really cute. Yesterday I went to see Red Riding Hood again (told you I loved it) with my brother. We used to go see movies all the time together...movies were our things...but we haven't been able to go for a while. So after we had seen Red Riding Hood, we decided to go see Rango.

And I guess the third thing is the reason Tyler and I went out to spend some time together...he leaves on Friday for training. He will be gone until the beginning of April when he will be here for a week. He leaves again and will be here at the beginning of May and he will be here for three weeks (he will be here for Gabriel's third birthday) and then he leaves to go to Afghanistan for a year...

I got a little emotional last night when Tyler left the house. Gabriel was really tired and he was screaming because he didn't want Tyler to leave. As Tyler was walking away and out to his car, I picked Gabriel up and he wrapped his arms around my neck and hugged tight and we both just cried. I have been trying not to think about Tyler being gone, but I can't help it because it is getting closer...

Rise and Rise Again...

All right...yesterday was definitely a bad day...and I apologize...moving on!!!

I have realized something...This isn't something that is happening to me, it was my decision to go on Weight Watchers and lose weight so I have to stop feeling sorry for myself and get up and do something! I have decided that I am going to start doing yoga again. I used to love doing it, it was so relaxing and fun and wonderful. I did it while I was pregnant too because I have tons of yoga dvds and one was Yoga Mama for pregnant women. I have my own mat because when I was going to Virginia Western I took a yoga class and it was my favorite class of them all...go figure haha.

I am going to be super strict on my points from right now on and I am going to do my yoga and maybe one my dancing videos when Gabriel is taking a nap because I can do yoga while he is watching TV or playing...it won't be as relaxing that way, but there is only so much you can do when you have a toddler that doesn't take a nap during the day and he enough energy for five people haha.

This isn't something that is happening to me, it is my choice for a change and I am going to embrace it!!

As they said on the new Robin Hood with Russell Crowe..."Rise And Rise Again Until Lambs Become Lions!"

Off Day

Today has definitely been an off day.

I got Gabriel into bed last night really early and then came back into the bedroom to watch TV for a little while...right before I decided to go to sleep, Gabriel came into the room saying he didn't feel good. So I let him stay in there with us for a while and he fell back to sleep, but when I tried to take him back to bed, he clung to me and wouldn't let go...

Against my better judgement, I let him sleep with us even though I try not to do that...I want him to stay in his bed every night and not get used to sleeping with us...but I gave in last night. So when Josh got up at six this morning for work, Gabriel woke up and didn't go back to sleep...

Right from the start, it was a bad morning. I am not a morning person at all and I usually don't fall asleep until after midnight and then I hate getting up any earlier than I have to...so I was cranky because he got up earlier than he usually does...

I have been following my diet for almost a month and I have only lost 3 pounds...so I am starting to get really discouraged and I haven't been following it yesterday or today...and then I feel like crap because I haven't been following it but then I think that it won't do me any good to follow it but it still makes me feel like crap...

I hate days like this...my already low self esteem goes through the floor...

Proud!

I figured I would post pictures of my house after I rearranged it since it is clean! haha

The first picture is of Gabriel's playroom...



This is the den area. We have the big screen tv in our bedroom (and it is like watching a movie in a theater haha) and the smaller tv in the den so we wanted the couch close to the tv so we could actually see it. The couch and tv used to be where Gabriel's playroom is now...




Here is our dining room. Gabriel's toys used to be here and the table used to be where the couch and tv are now. Our movies that you can see on the right side used to be in our spare/storage room and we could never get to them, so we wanted to move them out where we could get to them easier...

And here are our movies! This isn't all of them, the rest of them are still in the spare room along with all of our tv series collections. I didn't want it to look too crowded so we left them hidden in the room...

I'm so happy about how I rearranged our house and I am so proud of myself for keeping it so clean for a week...I know that doesn't seem like much of an accomplishment, but for those of you who know me, it is definitely a huge achievement for me and I'm proud! :)

Help Me!

As most of you know, I have been reading to Gabriel every night from the Chronicles of Narnia series and we have both been enjoying it. Well, I finished the series last night and I don't know what to read to him next.

I have most of the Percy Jackson series but I don't have the last book so I don't know if I should start that series until I get the last book. I also have Inkheart but I don't have the other two books in the series. Those books are thicker than the Narnia books so I would have enough time to get them before I needed them but I kinda wanted to start a series that I had all of the books in...

The only problem with that is that the only series I have all of the books for is the Lord of the Rings series but I have never read them. I'm not really worried about the content of the books but I don't want to be falling asleep while I am reading them to him...but I do want him to fall asleep haha. Has anyone read them? Are they as entertaining and fast paced as the movies? Are the movies even anything like the books?

I don't suppose I have to read a series to him, I could just read classics that I have like The Three Musketeers, Little Women, Gulliver's Travels...just curious if anyone has any suggestions of books I should get and read to him.

Sad :(

I am sad to report that we will be getting rid of our cable and internet tomorrow. We just can't afford to pay all of our bills with the pay cut we took when Josh got this job, so we are cutting the ones that we can live without. I will still be able to post on here when I go over to my grandmother's house and I think my parents are getting internet at their house soon, so I will be able to get online at their house too.

I am really not looking forward to having no internet while my brother Tyler is overseas, but I am going to try to make the best of it. When Josh is able to get a better paying job with Carilion and move up into a different field at the hospital sometime this summer, we might be able to get the internet back.

I still have internet on my phone so I can check my email and my facebook and such, but it just won't be the same. This will be a bit of a blessing because it will cut down on the distractions I have in my life and I will be able to focus more on my novel and my new Bibly study that I started on Monday, and really losing weight and keeping my house clean and preparing for us to have another baby in our house hopefully within the next two years...and it will help us to save as much money as we can with the little amount that we have coming into the house...

I just wanted to give everyone a heads up that I won't be on here as often as I am...and please continue to keep us in your prayers as we deal with financial struggles...

Fun

Josh was off yesterday, so he took Gabriel down to the garage/man-cave for some father/son time so I could clean the house...and clean I did. I don't know what came over me...I was a cleaning fool yesterday! I cleaned our room and the bedroom and moved my night stand so I could have more room beside my bed. Then, when I got out to the living room, I decided that I wanted a bit of a change.

Our dining room, living room, den, and kitchen are basically all one big room with a beam in the middle. I wanted to keep it as open as possible but I definitely wanted to change it up a bit. So I rearranged EVERYTHING!! I cleaned and swept and organized as I went, but there is nothing that it in the same place as it was before. And I LOVE it!!!

I still have a lot of laundry to put away and to wash, and I still have some things to organize and put away, so that is what I will be focusing on today...I hate cleaning, but yesterday was really fun! And having a new house...basically...is always a good way to shake things up and keep them interesting.

Chickens...?

Can chickens get any dumber? Our next door neighbors, who are also Josh's aunt and uncle, have a bunch of chickens. And some of them are actually ours but we keep them over there because they have a coop. Well, they don't leave the chickens in the coop, they let them run around their yard...which would be fine with me if they stayed in their yard. You would think that they would stay away from our yard because of the three barking dogs, one of which is the size of a pony...but do they? Absolutely not.

I believe I told the story on here about the first time that Apollo caught a chicken after chasing them for many months...it wasn't a pretty sight. But, I called over there and told them that Apollo had killed a chicken and it turned out to be a rooster...which was fine at the moment because they had too many roosters anyway and they were going to kill and eat them eventually...well, a few weeks later, they called Josh to tell him that Apollo had killed yet another rooster, but he had killed the one that they were going to keep.

So far, he has killed about seven roosters I think (they had ten I believe), and they were mad. Well, my dogs are contained within my yard by a fence. It isn't my fault that your stupid roosters keep coming over the line and getting themselves killed my my dog. It isn't like he left our yard and ran over there and killed one. I could see that as being our fault, but he doesn't leave the yard. But every single day, those stupid chickens are strutting around right on the line and every once in a while, one crosses over too far and Apollo grabs it.

We have told them to put the chickens up because they keep coming in our yard and that is why Apollo kills them...but they still let them run around. Yesterday, Gabriel was looking out the window and he said, "Look, mommy, a chicken!" so I went to look but about that time, the chicken went around the side of the house and Apollo spotted him...and he took off and went around the house after him. I ran around to the back windows and saw Apollo coming around the back of the house with yet another chicken in his mouth...and he was running back towards the front of the house. So I went and shut the front door really quick so Gabriel wouldn't see it because he kept asking me where the chicken went and I just kept saying, "I don't know, sweetie."

So I texted Josh and told him to call his uncle and tell him that if he wants to keep any of his stupid chickens alive, he needs to put them up and stop letting them run wild and get themselves killed. He didn't call him, and I don't blame him, because he will be mad and act like it is our fault! I'm sorry your moronic chickens keep waltzing over to our yard, where they know an extremely large dog lives, and then never returning home...but it isn't my fault! And it makes me mad to know that they will blame it on us...ugh!

Sorry, I know, completely random blog post, but I had to vent about those friggin' chickens!! They drive me crazy!!!

Goin' strong!

So I haven't weighed myself because I am waiting until Monday morning, but I have really been sticking to my points and I am excited to find out how much I have lost already and how much I will lose by Monday. I am not going to keep my goals really low for now and I really just want to lose about ten pounds before April 9th because that is when I am in Leslie's wedding...ten pounds will help me feel better about standing up there in my gorgeous strapless dress!

I have also been doing really good with only drinking one bottle of Diet Mtn Dew per day and not drinking any caffeine after 6 p.m....it has helped me fall asleep faster! But...and I don't know if this is related at all...I have had really strange dreams for the past two nights. I dream a lot and I remember most of my dreams too unlike a lot of people, but two nights in a row and them being about a ten on the weird scale...that is definitely new for me. I love to dream, even if they are weird dreams, because they are fun. But if they are sad, or a bad dream about my son, that is when I don't like it. I am curious to see if I will be dreaming another crazy dream tonight.

A bust!

All right, so this weekend was a bust! My bestie Leslie is getting married in April and I am a bridesmaid...her bridal shower was this Saturday and one of the other bridesmaids, Jenny, made these amazing cupcakes and I had two (because I couldn't help myself) and a bunch of other snack foods. And then yesterday, my hubby made this awesome mac and cheese (which is a lot of points on WW) and I just decided to take the weekend off and start up fresh and new today...so that is what I did.

I have also decided to cut back on my Diet My Dew intake and up my water intake...so I am going to stop drinking any and all caffeine after 6 pm (because I can't sleep to save my life and I don't know if that is part of it but we will see) and I am only going to drink one thing of DMD (whether it be an 8 oz glass, a 12 oz bottle, or a 24 oz bottle like I have now) and then drink water the rest of the day...that way I can still have my drink but I will be drinking more water and I am hoping that will speed up my weight loss. And instead of weighing myself so often, I am going to weigh myself every Monday morning (starting next Monday) and no more...

Oh, and we aren't going to be able to have a baby right now because we can't afford it...we got his first paycheck from the hospital and it is way way WAY less than he used to get with his other job...and way less than we thought it was going to be. We are going to wait until he can move up in the hospital and get a better paying job...at least we hope to. But I am still going to stay on WW until I get pregnant again (unless I reach my ultimate goal before then) just to get into the habit of doing it again...

And another one bites the dust!!!

So, after being on Weight Watchers for two days I have lost two pounds. If I keep this up for a month losing one pound per day, I will reach my goal!! This is definitely encouraging and I am still going strong for Day Three!

I am also excited because my parents are coming to get Gabriel today and I get a break...well not really, because I have to clean. But they are going to New Orleans for a week and before they go on a trip they like to spend as much time with him as they can because they see him so often, they don't like going too long without seeing him if they can help it. I don't know what they would do if we ever moved away.

This is going to be a short post because I have to get Gabriel ready but I might write some more later.

One Day, One Pound

All right! Well, I have lost one pound and I am going strong into Day Two! I did really well with my points yesterday and I was rewarded for it by the loss of a pound!! Yay!

Yesterday was a pretty good day, all in all...Gabriel went to the potty four times and he wore his Pull-Ups training pants for the last half of the day. I'm still not wanting to put him in regular underwear because he doesn't tell me everytime he has to go to the potty...he just tells me the times when he wants to go. Once I get him really working and going to the potty more times than he uses his trainers, I will start putting him in underwear.

I really would like to have him potty trained before his birthday which gives me almost three months...I am a little behind on getting him potty trained because I haven't been working with him as diligently as I should have been...but I definitely want him trained before we have another baby because I only want one in diapers!

I want to redo the bathroom next to Gabriel's room, which will be his bathroom, in something for him. It is also the bathroom that everyone uses when they come to our house, but I want it to be his bathroom. I want to make it into a kiddie bathroom so he will feel like it is his...but I don't know what theme I want it to be yet. They have great stuff at Target and Walmart, so I am just going to have to do some looking around and see which one I like best.

Okay, so this was definitely a random post, and not what I thought I would be writing about, but this is just something that has been weighing on my mind a lot.

Well...so much for that...

Okay, so starting today, I am back on Weight Watchers. I tried a few other things and they just weren't working fast enough for me...so Weight Watchers it is again. I was going to stay on Weight Watchers the whole time I was pregnant anyways, so I figured I would just start now and then stay on my whole pregnancy and then after I have the baby until I lose the weight...which if I stay on Weight Watchers and only gain twenty to thirty pounds like I am supposed to, then it won't take any time at all to lose the weight instead of keeping it on this whole time like an idiot...

Day One of Weight Watchers has gone pretty good so far. Josh and I have been talking about it and I also talked to Tyler and we aren't sure if we are going to wait til June to start trying to get pregnant again. Tyler told me that he wouldn't be upset or offended or anything if I had a baby while he was overseas, and he is excited that we are going to have another baby soon. And since I am on Weight Watchers now, I won't mind getting pregnant before I lose all of the weight because I will still have enough time to lose all of it before I really start gaining any baby weight.

The only thing we are waiting on is for Josh to quit smoking. He wants to quit anyway, and there is a program with Carilion that will pay for everything he needs to quit...like the gum or the patch...and I am pretty sure it is a support group type of thing too. So, that is his motivation to stop smoking and that is my motivation to lose weight....

My will power is really being put to the test now because we have so much candy and so many sweets in the house left over from Valentine's Day and just in general, but I am determined to stay strong and lose this weight...as much as possible...before I get pregnant again.

Valentine's Monkey

I took Gabriel to the store to let him pick out what he wanted for Valentine's Day. I told him he could pick out one toy or stuffed animal and one thing of candy.

Well, he didn't want candy, he wanted marshmellows and he didn't want the mini ones like he usually gets...he wanted the big Jet-Puffed ones that were strawberry flavored...so that is what he got. And which stuffed animal did he want?

The biggest one there, of course. Now, normally I wouldn't let him just get whatever he wanted...but there were some special circumstances thrown in there today so I got him the biggest stuffed animal they had...

...a monkey that is bigger than him. So there he is enjoying his strawberry marshmellows and his Valentine's Monkey...that I have started calling George because he says it reminds him of George of the Jungle.

And, of course, he wanted to take George to bed with him and cuddle with him instead of his stuffed Larry from Veggietales's The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything. Larry got bumped to the toybox and George got the bed. After I read to him from The Chronicles of Narnia series like I do every night and he fell asleep...he had his arms slung over George's legs.

So when he woke up this morning and came walking into my bedroom and opened the door, the first thing I saw was George. He was carrying George and his blankie that he sleeps with too and he somehow opened the door haha.

He propped George up on his daddy's pillow and leaned back against him to read a book...George is now sitting on the floor with Gabriel while he is playing and running around.

He absolutely loves his Valentine's Monkey George...I don't know how long it will last, but for now it is adorable! And I had to share! :)

Bye Bye, Mater!

So...a while ago, Josh bought this piece of crap truck. It was silver, it didn't run very well, and it was all nice and rusty like Mater from the movie Cars...so that is what I started calling it. Over the next few months, Josh took all of the spare money we had and put it into this stupid truck and redid the entire engine...but it still didn't run. He would go out to start it in the morning and for one reason or another, it wouldn't start and he would have to take my Xterra, leaving Gabriel and me stuck at home.

We got the truck so we wouldn't have to share a car anymore and after spending a few thousand dollars, we were still sharing a car. I have hated that truck since the minute he bought it. We don't need to go a lot of places but we haven't been able to do anything like getting our weekly adjustment at the Chiropractor or spending time with my family on Thursdays which has been a weekly thing for as long as I can remember...it was frustrating. Plus, being stuck at home was really driving me crazy...I couldn't just get out of the house if I wanted to and be around other people.

Now that Josh is working two jobs in Roanoke instead of one job at the lake (not ten minutes from our house), we wanted to sell his truck and get a car that is better on gas milage for him to drive...oh yeah, and one that actually runs! A friend of his had a car that he wanted to trade for an SUV or a truck, so Josh talked to him the other night about trading the car for his truck...

MATER IS FINALLY GONE!!!!! He came over last night, left his car here, and took the truck for good. Thank goodness!!! Now, the car needs a few things before he can drive it but Josh is taking care of them today so that I can have my car back to go to church tomorrow. I am so happy to see that truck go! I just hope this car lasts for a while.

Another Baby?

No, I'm not pregnant...yet...but Josh and I have been talking about trying to have another one in the next month or two. But my brother leaves March 18th for training and then he leaves May 26th ( I think) for Afghanistan and all I could think was...I don't want to have a baby while my big brother is overseas. When he leaves in May, he will be gone for 9 months, so I started thinking I would rather wait until June to start trying that way the baby won't be born before March and Tyler will be getting back in February. (Unless the baby comes super early, but we won't get into that)

I also thought that this would be the perfect time to get pregnant again because it would give me something to be happy about while Tyler is gone. I'm going to be a wreck while he is gone and being pregnant and looking forward to having another little munchkin on the way would definitely be something to be excited about. It would bring some joy to a not so joyous time.

AND...it would also give me four months to lose this weight that I wanted to lose before I got pregnant again. There is my motivation! I already told Josh that when I got pregnant again I was going on Weight Watchers to keep from gaining too much weight like I did with Gabriel and I don't want to be in this position again...

I am also in my friend Leslie's wedding in April and my dress is gorgeous. It fits, but it would look even better if I lost a bit of weight before then...I am getting excited about the next few months and that is really saying something because I have really been dreading this year for a while just because my best friend isn't going to be here...he will be in danger overseas and I was already planning for a bad year.

But with this plan...this year is looking up already. :)

Freezing!

I am sitting here in bed freezing my butt off!! I have a sweater on and a huge fluffy blanket and I am still shivering. That isn't really what I wanted to write about but I didn't want to have another entry titled Update haha so I figured I would start off with a little something random and completely off topic.

Josh has been training all this week and he really likes his new job, and he started driving the bus again on Friday. He is excited about having two jobs, but I know it is going to wear him down really quick. We don't know how much he will be making, but we went together and filled out the applications and paperwork for our benefits and we are both really excited about that...and we are willing to work with less money for the benefits that we are getting.

Also, Josh is excited already about moving on up and getting a better job with more pay and better hours. He has his foot in the door with all jobs Carilion and he is definitely excited...we both are.

And now that I have said excited a million times, maybe I should talk about something else...but the only problem with that is I really have nothing else to say. Things are going pretty good now but I am still stressed. And I'm not even sure if I am really stressed or if I am just in a rut. Do you ever get in a rut where you just fell blah all the time?? That is exactly how I am feeling now and have been feeling for a while.

I'm not exactly sure what to do about it either and it is not a fun way to feel. I really want to get things moving...I am very impatient. I want to swim and be in the water and take my scuba classes and get my dives in and become an instructor and I want it all to happen now. Then again, I want to lose the rest of this weight that I can't seem to get rid of...and I want that gone now and I am so blah and discouraged because things are so slow paced that it is driving me crazy! Ugh! I think I am going to stop ranting and go work on my novel (one of many that I am working on at the moment) while I have some great ideas in my head...who knows how long that will last! :)

Time for another update

I need to update everyone on the job situation but first I want to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers...

So, Josh went yesterday for an interview with the railroad. It was an all day hiring session that he would go to the first part of the day and take tests and whatever the instructors wanted them to do and then they would take a break. After the break, they would come back and the instructors would call the names of the ones who would remain for a one on one interview and if your name wasn't called, you went home. Well, Josh wasn't called for an interview.

However, during the break, he got a call from the lady at the hospital that he had been going to for interviews and such and she offered him the job...which he, of course, accepted. He goes in on Monday for orientation and then we think he will start work next Friday. He will be working Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday every week, ten hour days. He went this week to the bus company that he used to drive for and asked if they would hire him back to work Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursdays since those were the only days he was off. They said yes and he went to get everything taken care of so we are waiting for everything to come back before he will start driving again...and that could take a few weeks.

There are still a few things that we are waiting on that have been a little stressful, but at least Josh has a job now...well, two jobs. We filed our taxes and we should be getting that money back soon and that will help my stress levels go down a ton...because all of that money will be going back into our savings.

We have been taking Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University and that is going to teach us how to save our money and be smart with the money we will be making and that will make me very happy! Josh won't be able to come with me anymore after this weekend because he will be working, but we will be able to go over it together and I am the one that deals with the money anyway...so I am excited to get rockin' and rollin'!

Thanks again for all of the prayers!!

Venting

Wow, two posts in one day...I'm on a roll haha. Well, first off I am going to blame this next post on me being stressed and sick and all around not having a very good past few weeks.


Aren't men the biggest wimps when it comes to being sick?? When Josh is sick, he lays around and does nothing but whine and complain and I have to do everything...bring him food, hand him the remote when it is only inches out of his reach, get him something to drink, change the movie...everything. Now, none of this would be the problem if he did the same things for me when I was sick. But does he? Yeah right!!!


Not only does he not help me with anything, he disappears!! "I don't want to get sick!" he says as he leaves the house to go be by himself in the garage/man-cave. He doesn't even have the decency to take Gabriel down there with him so I can wallow in self pity alone. Nope, he leaves him up there with me so I get no rest and it take me even longer to get better.


Every other month is my bad period where I have crazy cramps and all I want to do is curl into a ball with a heating pad on my stomach and just die. I can't even get a little break then either!! He doesn't want to be around me because I am in a bad mood too. Yeah, you would be in a bad mood too if you felt like this every other month and didn't have someone here to serve you 24/7! He wouldn't be able to handle the pain us ladies go through on our periods. I know that is why God made women's pain tolderance higher than men. Men just couldn't handle it!

So, about an hour ago, Gabriel fell asleep on my bed. I thought, This is the perfect time to take a nap myself. Well, I laid down and so did Josh. A few minutes later, Josh was out...I dozed off for about twenty minutes and then I woke up feeling worse than I had when I fell asleep. I'm too sick to take a nap! This is ridiculous! Josh and Gabriel are still passed out and here I am on the computer mad as hellfire and feeling like crap!!!

:(

Thanks for reading my rant! Hopefully my next post will be on a lighter note!

Sick

For those of you who follow my facebook, you all know that I am sick. I don't get sick very often, but when I do, it makes up for all the time that I wasn't sick (or so it seems). And with everything else that has been going on, this is the last thing that I want right now. I probably got sick because I am so stressed...I tend to do that to myself. My stress basically rules my life and I hate that...

So Josh went yesterday to his old job at the bus company to see if they would hire him back. They all said yes right away but he had to go today to get refingerprinted, take a drug test, and do a few other things before he can start driving again. They told him it could be three weeks before all of it comes back...so there goes a quick fix for that.

Some of my stress will hopefully be leaving here soon because Josh just went back to Social Services. The lady that we were working with the last time we were there called him back and said that we were approved for a part of TANF (Temporary Assistance for Needy Families) where we take our bills in to her and they pay up to a certain amount. And if we don't use the whole amount, they write the rest of it into a check for us...getting our bills paid and caught up will definitely take away some stress...but if he doesn't get a job soon, we are just going to be right back in the same boat.

We should be getting food stamps and unemployment within the next week or so, and that will help out too, but it would be so much easier if he could get a job...and one that pays halfway decent. (And yes, I know, there are a lot of people in the same boat, but we aren't talking about them haha) He has an interview with the railroad tomorrow and I am basically praying for a miracle....that they love him and hire him on the spot...that would be amazing, but I know that won't happen. He applied for Dish Network too. He would be driving around and installing the dish and he would be making good money. And, the good news with that is, that if he does get the Carilion job, he can still work the Dish Network job because the schedules are opposite times of the week. That would be awesome!

So, thank you all for your prayers so far and please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

Update

I guess I should start from the beginning...Josh didn't work all last week and when he got his paycheck, we were hurting quite a bit because it was half of what he normally makes (which is barely enough to begin with). He went to apply for Unemployment just for that one week that he didn't work and more if we could get anything while he worked as much as he could and also tried to find a better job. He had an interview with Carilion and then a second interview and we were really hoping that he would get this job this week so he could quit. His boss didn't have the same thing in mind.

She fired him on Monday night.

Now, I am a stay at home mom. We have worked it out from the beginning so that I could stay home with our son (and other children if we decided to have any more), so Josh was the only one bringing in any income for our family. It has been pretty tight for a while because he hasn't been making a lot of money and it really hurt us when she didn't work him for an entire week, but now...I don't even know what to think.

It has been a pretty stressful week for us...(and I would appreciate some prayers)...so we have been back and forth between the unemployment office, social services to get food stamps and anything else we can apply for, and Josh has been applying for jobs anywhere and everywhere he can. He has an interview with the railroad on Wednesday and we are really hoping he gets some good news. (He has been hoping to get a railroad job for a long time now...we both have) So, please keep us in your thoughts on Wednesday and I will update you guys on that too.

I'm not sure what is going to happen, and to be honest, I am terrified, so please say a prayer for us...thanks!

Overdrive!

Josh has a job interview tomorrow and we are keeping our fingers crossed that he gets it. We aren't exactly sure what the pay would be (he will find out tomorrow) but the benefits are amazing and it will give him an opportunity to move up fairly quickly to better/more interesting/better paying jobs and more what he wants to be doing. Everyone please keep us in your prayers that he gets this job if it is the best thing for us (and if it will pay our bills). My fingers are crossed.

On slightly the same topic, I have been doing a lot of thinking about my job (my almost dream job) that we can't afford for me to begin the process of getting...so I am doing everything in my power to get as ready for it as I can, so that when we do have the money, I can jump in with both feet.

This job is, of course, Scuba Diving Instructor. I have to have all of my scuba equipment (and a lot of it before I even start taking the classes) so that is really what I am saving up for...and then of course I have to take the classes and work my way up to instructor (and I also want to do underwater photography)...but it is going to be a while before I can really get the ball rolling.

The Scuba shop that I am probably going to be getting a job with once I am an instructor (and also the place I am going to be doing all of my classes through) has a link with divessi.com to do a lot of online pre-classes. I have been doing those like crazy and I have been researching and reading and anything I can to be completely prepared.

I have also been emailing my instructor that I am going to take at least my first class with to let him know that I am still interested but we don't have the money to do it right now. He has been very understanding (it also helps that my dad knows him and most of the other instructors that work there) and very helpful with any questions I have about anything.

I can't wait to really dive in...haha...and Josh is completely supportive. I can tell that he wishes I could start right now and I know it bothers him that I can't, but he is doing his best. (And for those of you who know...that is high praise coming from me). I feel like, even though things are moving pretty slow right now, everything is finally starting to fall into place.

If Josh gets this job, or any better paying job with a better boss and more stable hours, the stress that is bothering both of us will all float away. And of course it will never completely go away...at least for me...but it will definitely help.

Thanks for all of the prayers and I will definitely update as I can! :)

Twilight!!!

All right...I know there are a lot of people out there that hate Twilight, but I am not one of those people. Now, I am not obsessed with it like all of the 13 year old girls out there screaming, "MARRY ME, ROB!!!", but I like it nonetheless. I liked the books and I was excited to see the movies when they came out, and I enjoyed them. I have not gotten Eclipse on dvd yet because we don't really have the money to go spend it on something that isn't a necessity, but I own Twilight and New Moon.

I let my mom borrow Twilight (the movie) when it first came out and I was surprised that she actually liked it. Even though she isn't a huge fan of the paranormal, she loved the love story between Bella and Edward.

So last night, Gabriel and I were over at Mom and Dad's house and Twilight came on Showtimes so, while my dad was watching Gabriel, Mom and I watched Twilight. New Moon came on right after Twilight, and since my mom hadn't seen it, we decided to watch that too. Now, we all know how New Moon ends...Edward asks Bella to marry him, she gasps, and the movie ends.

I get a text message this morning from my mom and this is exactly what it said..."So I'm about to die to see the third movie"...I busted out laughing! I told her I didn't have it yet, but when I did I would let her borrow it. A little later on in the day I get another text message...she went out and bought Eclipse!

I have created a monster! And I love it!!!

She told me I could have it once she watched it, but she had to see it. And she was NOT HAPPY when I told her the fourth one doesn't come out until November and then that is only the first half of the movie...and the second half doesn't come out until the following November. She was definitely not a happy camper haha and she even said, "Well, I'm glad I didn't get into it earlier than now because I hate waiting." :) And then she told me that she would be going with me to see Breaking Dawn in theaters!

Oh, and guess what Team she is...

*pause for effect*





Team Edward!

I thought she would like Jacob better, but she surprised me once again! I just love it! We are going to have a Twilight marathon once they are all out on dvd! :)

C. S. Lewis is a genius

So, I have been reading the Narnia books to Gabriel at night. We finished reading The Magician's Nephew last night and it was so great. It really explains the next book. We started reading The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe last night too and it is so great. So far, the movie follows the book pretty closely. I always wondered if it did.

Reading these books makes me want to watch the movies and I'm really sad they didn't make a movie of the first book. It was so great. And, like I said, it explains the second book so well. You understand it a lot better if you know what happens in The Magician's Nephew. I can't wait to read all of them.

I love the way he writes. It's funny and smart and endearing all at once. I usually read one chapter a night to Gabriel and he falls asleep but last night I read four chapters (the last two of The Magician's Nephew and the first two of The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe) before he fell asleep. I think I might enjoy reading these books to him more than he does haha.

Once we have read all of the Chronicles of Narnia, I will have to pick another series of books to read to him. I have Inkheart by Cornelia Funke and I thought that I could get Inkspell and Inkdeath and read those to him as long as the content wasn't bad. I skip over whatever I don't want Gabriel to hear anyway so that wouldn't be a problem...like one of the characters tells another one to shut up in The Magician's Nephew and since I don't want Gabriel saying that (and since we have had a problem with him saying it and getting into trouble) I just said "be quiet" instead. But I'm not sure...I might try to find another series of books to read to him. Any suggestions? I want to read books to him that he can understand but not kiddie books...books that are longer than fifty pages and even better if it is a series.

I love reading to him and it relaxes him enough to go to sleep. He fights sleep and he gets so worked up sometimes when I leave him in bed. I used to just let him scream in his crib because he would eventually go to sleep, but then he would climb out of his crib and I was having the hardest time keeping him in there. Now that he is in a regular bed, there is no way he would stay in it...at least not without him getting out and me taking him back a million times. But now, I put him in bed, give him a kiss, and then sit down and read to him until he falls asleep. It is less stress on him and me as well, and it's so great to read to your kids when they are growing up.

Anyways, I went on about this a lot longer than I thought I was going to haha. I will write more later.

So far, so good

Well, I have only been on my lifestyle change kick for 5 days and I have already lost 7 pounds! I stepped on the scale yesterday morning and just stood there for a few moments to really let it sink in. I was in shock but in a very good way. I went to weigh myself this morning too and the battery on my scale (that has been low and on the fritz for the past little bit) decided to give up on me...so I don't know if I have lost even more weight, but I already feel better.

I got a Primal Cookbook from my dad and there are so many great recipies in there that I can't wait to try. There are desserts in there that look amazing and with those, I won't even miss the things that I really love. And I can't wait to try the coconut pancakes...they look amazing!

Anyways, this is going to be a short little entry because I don't have a lot to write and I won't be able to update my weightloss until we get a new battery for my scale...but So Far, So Good :)

It's not a diet...It's a lifestyle change

Haha. It really is a lifestyle change. After feeling like crap all the time, having no energy, and being fat for too long, I have decided to take some drastic measures to get skinny again and to stop filling my body with junky foods.

I have started following the Primal Blueprint. It is a healthy way to eat that mirrors our ancient ancestors. Eating lots of plants and animals, simple exercising, and a more positive outlook with less stress.

The biggest thing that I am having problems with is giving up my Diet Mountain Dew. I wanted to give them up anyway for my New Years Resolution because I drink way too many of them and I know they are what is making me feel like crap most of the time. I haven't had anything to drink but water since Friday...so I am having some pretty crazy caffeine withdrawals, but it is all worth it. (I'm also on my period and having killer cramps, so this year so far has been a bit of a pain.)

I have been doing really good with following the Primal lifestyle other than exercising. I just want to get the eating down before I throw something else in there.

It isn't a diet, because I am going to eat like this for the rest of my life, it is a lifestyle change that is only for the better! :)